Since every family is unique, visitation schedules vary and are created taking into account the child’s needs and interests, the parents’ individual situations, and other relevant factors. Visitation can be according to a detailed schedule that clearly defines the dates and times the children will be with each parent, including holidays, birthdays, Mother’s day and Father’s day, and vacations. The parents may, instead, elect to use a reasonable visitation schedule, which is more of an open-ended visitation schedule. For obvious reasons, this type of plan works best with parents who co-parent well with each other and can be flexible. Create a parenting schedule with the degree of specificity needed to try and prevent chronic and/or toxic conflict, rather than one that will generate it. Should such conflicts and disputes later arise, remember that mediation is a process designed to help you to problem-solve and work through such things and disagreements.
When real abuse or neglect is occurring such that the child’s safety is at issue, particularly when certain types and levels of domestic abuse are involved, supervised visitation may be necessary. In this case, the visits with the other parent may be supervised by specified adults or by a professional monitor. In cases where the child’s safety and well being is threatened just by virtue of seeing the other parent, that parent may not be awarded any visitation rights if that is found to be in the best interests of the child. This is particularly applicable in cases of child abuse, child molestation, and where the parents otherwise pose a danger to their children.
Pasadena Parenting Plan Mediator
The California courts do not automatically give custody to the mother or the father, regardless of the age or sex of the children. As Mark Baer explains in his article Parents Should Think Twice Before Engaging in a Custody Battle Over Their Children, when court intervention is involved the judge is the only person responsible for assessing what is and isn’t in the child’s best interest. However, since judges have such limited knowledge of the family, their subjective determination may or may not actually be in the best interest of the child.
Not only do judges handle a great many cases and therefore not have the ability to develop a clear understanding of any given family, but their decisions are only based upon the “legally relevant and admissible evidence“ submitted to the court. Among other things, judges and juries are “triers of fact.” In other words, it is the job of a judge to determine the facts based upon conflicting evidence and then to apply to law to the facts, as found by them. Of course, such factual findings are based upon the “legally relevant and admissible evidence“ before them, not all the facts.
When parents are unable on their own to agree on something pertaining to their children, it’s frequently because there is a difference of opinion as to what is in their child’s best interest. While each parent may sincerely believe that what they want is in their child’s best interest, not all beliefs are fact based, regardless of how sincerely held they may be. There are different ways to parent kids. Parenting styles are a matter of perception. Who’s to say that yours is “better”? “Better” is in the eye of the beholder. Unless it’s something that is endangering the child, some perspective is in order. Mediation can help parents to find common ground, build bridges between them and problem solve. In other words, mediation helps parents reach durable agreements that address the interests and needs of both parents and their child.
To learn more about child custody and visitation, please contact Pasadena visitation mediator Mark B. Baer today!
